You can have another look at Catherine Thomson's presentation at your leisure.
Compare the two essays in terms of structure:
*Introduction: Is there a general context for the topic? Is there a topic sentence, i.e., is the content of the essay pointed out?
*Body: Are new ideas presented in new paragraphs? Is there evidence? Are you focusing on specific, well developed subjets or are you stating too many, not so well developed concepts?
*Conclusion: Does it weigh up the cons and pros mentioned? Does it show your personal stand on the issue?
Also bear in mind: the content of your essay must be RELEVANT, it must have COHESION and appropriate GRAMMAR, SPELLING, PUNCTUATION and VOCABULARY. It is essential that before setting to writing, you brainstorm, select and PLAN.
City Life, by Indian artist Meenakshi Jah Banerjee.
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